Disappointment

i am highly highly disappointed in someone i thought was my friend. i have known her, or at least thought i did for four years. i have been defending her against all rumours not knowing that i have been making a complete fool of myself.i feel so hurt. how can you be friends with some one for so long and the person will look you in the eye and lie about something trivial, maybe not so trivial. why would i carry rumours or rather truths....that i do not even know...to tell people outside? confusing i know.something i do not know about i'm the one spreading the rumour. i can't even express how i feel so am just going to give you a piece of advice; if there's anyone you knew in high school, be rest assured that the person will not be the same in college.i learnt the hard way.

how cam my so-called friend hear that people have been talking about her behind her back and assume its me? why the heck will it be me.

people are definitely not who they seem...don't be deceived especially by their looks.

vals day witha a new look!

you may have noticed, obviously that i have upgraded my blog.yes it has a fresh new look.i just discovered most of this stuff today.

let me talk a little about valentines' day(vals day). its a day to express love to your loved ones and has become increasingly commercial. it is also a day to appreciate the people in your life. In church today, i learnt that God's love covers a multitude of sin. as long as you believe and trust in God he will never leave you exposed.God can never give away your secrets. he's the perfect bestfriend.

we had a carnival in church today and it was really fun as we praised and worshipped God. there was a particular song that touched me.it always moves me to tears;

'He came from heaven to earth to show the way.From the earth to the cross, my debt to pay.from the cross to the grave, from the grave to the sky.Lord I lift your name on high'

the song just goes to tell us how much our God loves us.

this is a song that i will always sing to God to tell him how much i love him;

'you are the love of my life.you are the one that i live for.you are, you are my everything. i wouldn't trade you for silveror gold.i wouldn'tn trade you for riches untold. you are my everything'. thank you God for loving me with a perfect love.

in this season of love, i want all my friends to know that i love you all very much...even when it hurts me to do so.....jimi, ogugua,kene, wukeh,IB,tobi,onyi,chinwe,annette,yvonne,maryam,ojiugo,......to name a few.thanks for being my friends.

with love,

moi

spring 2010

I'm just going to tell you what my semester looks like.you might not really understand but i will try to explain. first i have physics with a professor named psaker. you would not understand this guy. everyone is scared of him because a lot of people do not pass his course. people have delayed taking physics in the hope that he will leave the school but the guy is resilient he is not going anywhere in the nearest future.for someone like me who does not like....ok i should not say that.lets just say I'm not too good at it.with a teacher like that, what am i going to do? then, there's chemistry.the professor is a smiling devil he seems so nice but last semester only 3 students got an A in his class. well, let's just say that chemistry is not my favorite subject. then i have an information systems class with an also tough professor. he makes you feel so relaxed but when its time for tests.....lets just say you will have to sweat a little.i also have calculus with a teacher that expects you to already know it. i mean, he just wrote an explanation on the board and then gave us questions to solve. helloooo aren't you supposed to solve a question first so we can understand?. statistics with a very cynical professor which i don't have a problem with as long as i pass the class.

well that's me this semester...here's to hoping that i get a great GPA!

cheers n ciao!!

XMAS HOLIDAY

well well well...it's been a while since i was here.that is because i could not find anything worth writing about. now am going to tell you about my Christmas break. to say it was interesting would not be entirely true and to say it was boring would not be true as well. it was just somewhere in between.
I got back home on the 17th of December and all i did was shopping shopping shopping!! i'm sure you're thinking..that's exciting...but i tell you solemnly it is not! especially when you can not seem to find anything you like. well after days of shopping, we went to villa*. i already hate going to villa because the first few days is all cooking and cleaning and the house is huge. my grandma and my aunt always let us get there first so that we will do the cleaning. i had had enough and so had my father..for the first time i might add. so we waited for them to get there first before we did. imagine the sneaky little humans.they got there first alright but they did absolutely nothing. imagine that! they just came back, dropped their bags and went out to but drinks. so after everything we ended up doing the cleaning. on Xmas day, all i did was cook and clean..how is that an exciting day huh? anyway this holiday, two of my uncles were getting married. so we started the preparation. on the d-day, we left the house late for a start and there was a lot of traffic on the road so we eventually got there around 4pm when the event was meant to start at 1pm. well since we were there late, you would think we would begin immediately but oh no we didn't. we spent two hours just waiting for the event to start. that's 6pm. it's dark already. many people are getting really angry and are leaving. me as usual finds the whole situation funny.well i convinced my mum that we should leave before it gets really dark and we did. to make matters worse, we hadn't eaten anything since morning and when we got home, the dogs were out of there cage and the dogs didn't know any of us. in the end we had to wait for everyone to come back. so much for leaving early.
The second wedding was beautiful and well organized. the only problem was that i was a chief bridesmaid. yes!that was a problem considering that i had only just met the lady once before that time. surprising isn't it? definitely. i really didn't understand it. didn't she have any friends or family? why did it have to be me? as in really! the only good part was getting all dolled up(wish i had a pic to put here) because i looked really different and nice..i might add. on the day, everyone seemed to be in a mood.any little mistake and you will get screamed at by ten different people. i had my bath and got dressed. the bride was about to leave and i remembered i left my shawl.i had to get it because i could not enter the church without it. my mum just started shouting at me.."you should never leave the brides side". well beat me for not knowing that. you would think i go to weddings to watch the bridesmaids and what they do. next thing the bride shouted at me to open the door for her. i can keep going on and on about how terrible the day was for and oh! i didn't eat a pin at the wedding. imagine that! only bright spot was that the bestman was kinda hot..definitely older than me. he tried to chat me up but i messed it up when i said, "the groom is my mummy's brother". how childish. well in the end, i ate all i wanted to eat and more!
When i got back home, i did some more shopping as it was almost time for school. now am back in school and guess what! I'M GLAD TO BE BACK!! because no one will tell me am a terrible bridesmaid or send me around. oh yes! before i forget a chief bridesmaid = wedding housegirl!!. one piece of advice....if the bride isn't your best friend or at least a really close friend, then please do not do it...for your own good. do not!!
ciao amigos!!

a temporary obsession with new moon

I know most guys are like ‘here we go again’ but mine is different. I have read all the books and i love them. Unlike most people am on team Jacob and not Taylor if you get what i mean.
The guy is cute and hot but what i like about him is how he portrayed his character. I guess Robert did well but i don’t really like his character so. I mean he is unimaginably and annoyingly perfect. He is sooo patient its annoying. I mean why can’t he get jealous for a while or something. I like Jake because he’s spontaneous and very humane. Now to their personal lives....why are robsten making a big deal out of their romance? Why can they just admit it and let it go away. It’s because of the suspense they re creating that everyone is waiting to hear the truth. The thing is we all know they are going out. I mean they have private meetings in clubs and they have been seen making out. Even the director Catherine has admitted to it and some of the other co-stars so what’s their point? I kind of like Kristen because she’s herself no matter how famous she is and she portrays her character really well. The girl cracks me up sometimes. When i heard she changed her dress for the premiere after the red carpet, i couldn’t stop laughing. You should have seen her on the red carpet; she was twitching and twisting her fingers as if to say’ oh please hurry. I’m tired of wearing this stinking dress’ she even admitted that she never wanted to wear a dress she just decided to try. Haha! Then there’s Taylor. It seems Kristen gave him the idea of hiding his relationship with swift. He even gave it to E! That he’s idea of a first date is a hockey game. Whether he was being smart or sarcastic we would not know but as far as am concerned they are going out. What are the odds!. The guy took her to game, took her shopping, had dinner with her mum. What else is left. No guy unless he’s your boyfriend(even that isn’t so constant) would follow you shopping unless he’s gay(no offence). Swift spoke about him in SNL and blew him a kiss. Unless she was doing a publicity stunt, then they are going out. Anyway who really cares? There’s Robert who apparently wears dirty clothes and doesn’t wash that scattered hair of his. I mean why the heck do people like that hair. It is everywhere; flying in different directions. What’s so nice or hot about it? If you tell me Taylor’s hair, i would totally agree. To me Robert isn’t hot or fine or any of that. Yes he has a striking face i agree. There’s just something about his face that draws you to him and that why i agree with him being a vampire but not with him being Edward NEVER!! There are many more people in twilight that aren’t known so much. Lets start with Kellan Lutz. That guy is in your face hot and funny. He is very much like he’s character. He’s very playful and jokes a lot. I like him for that. Alex Maraz is another hot guy. He plays Paul the ever angry werewolf. Wow that guy is hot and young.sadly he’s married with a kid. Not that i’ll ever meet him or go out with him..its just nice to know he’s available..lol! he totally loves his fame. The thing is he’s eting his cake and having it. He’s famous enough to get money foe endorsement but not enough to have girls chasing him down alleys like R.Pattz. the other wolfs are hot but not so striking to me. One last hot guy is Jamie Bowie Campbell. My my my he’s hot in this should i say ignorant way. He actually looks like a girl but is still hot sha. I cannot finish this without acknowledging Dakota. That is one talented actress and she’s so young and pretty.
I can’t wait to watch new moon and see how these people did.
P.S i really do not envy celebrities because they have really crazy fans. Imagine someone asking Kristen,’how does it feel to kiss a vampire?’ stupid! the character is a vampire and the actor is just a normal person. I don’t blame Kristen for insulting some of the fans. You gotta love that chic.

random thoughts

hey..i havent written in a while because nothing has really spoken to me. right now i'm going to put some random thoughts down. on a happy note can someone please send me the new moon movie because am kind of obsessed with it. its getting really tiring. once i watch the movie i'll be back to normal and oh! i don't think robert is hot...taylor's definitely hot and cute so he's cool to me.
now to more serious issues.has there ever been anyone that annoys you very very much? i don't think you understand...anything the person says or does touches a raw nerve in you. well i have a friend like that. i'm even starting to doubt if i can say she's my friend. i really do not understand how this happened. first of all i get easily irritated and i get over it quickly as well but in her case its like the way she annoys me the anger never goes. its just simmers underneath such that whenever she says anything to me or does anything, i just explode. really. i can't even express myself. infact i can't write this anymore. i need help.

The Truth

i know this is a cliche and all but i still have to say it,'the truth hurts'. and another thing i can boldly say is true is 'the truth will set you free' oh! yes it will. i have a little story to tell from my own personal experience. where to begin....

there was this guy in my high school class. his name is brandon*(not real name of course).well everyone except me thought he was cute. that's besides the point though. well we never talked;not even the occasional hi or hello. this was how we spent the three years of junior high school. oh wait! in the 3rd year of junior high, we had a rift...funny right??? considering we do not even talk. it was all because of an art assignment. well he didn't do his and there was someone that had two. he begged the person for it and the person decided to take a vote on whether or not to give him. he asked 10 people myself and my friend included. well majority said no.brandon asked the guy who the majority were and funny enough the guy only said my name and that of my friend. well that was were we started to talk by not talking...irony huh? anyway senior high school came and we were in the same class again. funny enough he's seat was directly behind mine. little by little we got talking and i found out that he was a nice guy and was cool. so at that time i thought we were friends.we got closer and closer...from my own point of view.well in our final year in high school, i finally asked him about the junior school incident and he was like 'why did i say no?' iwas like, 'that was my opinion and you were being childish about it' blah blah blah.anyway after our final exams we all used to play cards a lot and it was sooo much fun...and i used to win a lot so whenever i wanted to join a game the guys would always yell at me that i should go.guys...they were scared of a girl beating them. brandon was actually the most violent about the card thing so i asked him why he yelled at only me and not my friend(the same one he had a rift with in junior high with me).guess what he said!'we are not that close'.boy was i happy.that was like the closest any guy had come to saying they cared about me. oh yeah and he sent me a message on xmas day sayin he wanted to be the first to say merry xmas. how sweet...except i think he forwarded that to everyone in his address book. anyway am just saying all these to explain how our relationship was.don't get me wrong..i don't like this guy as in i want to go out with him..i love(or should i say loved him) i mean i sent him a bday card across continents.back to the story.we graduated from high school and now he's in college on a different continent.we chatted a lotlike almost everyday about really random stuff and i was actually feeling like we were pretty close for me to tell him some personal stuff. boy was i wrong!then suddenly in the blink of an eye...precisely at the point were i was going to spill my guts to him...he cut me off. i mean i sent him emails, chat messages and skyped him but he didn't reply. the last message i got from him which was actaully written like with a little thought was in july...after i sent him a sad mail..like why did u cut me off.well after his mail i though ok we are good now but i was wrong.we were far from good...very far.it got worse after that.after a few months i sent him a mail and was like your online on skype and yet you don't answer.then i get a stupid reply,'oh yeah i'm always online on skype but that doesn't mean am there. i saw your messages' uh huh and you didn't think it required a reply huh? well i kept trying to reach him but nah nah no reply. this hurts a lot because i know that he sees my messages.he can't say his never there cuz he writes on peoples walls on facebook. my frends were like forget this guy but i kept trying. ok this was when the truth hit me....the most painful part. i was chatting with my best friend and we were discussing guys when i brought brandon up. i told her everything and guess what she said,'he really doesn't or doesn't really...how should i say it...care about you'.POW!!!staright to my face. the tears just started flowing. i felt like my heart was breaking...it really really hurt. don't get me wrong here..i do not like this guy as in wanting to go out with him..i loved him as a friend. i cried a little...ok more than a little. then i thought about it.i reviewed our relationship and i realized that may be or may be not that was the truth. i decided it was the truth and boy i felt relieved...like the weight had been lifted off my shoulders. i felt free and light. it seemed like i had known all along but i just needed a confirmation. all the hurt and the pain just left me. i told my girlfriend i was over it and she was like don't worry dori it will take time. i said whatever and she was like no!!you can't just say whatever because he meant a lot to you. yes i really care about him but now i have realized that the feeling isn't mutual. he may have a different point of view but right now this is what i take as the truth. you know am still a little confused..if he didn't care why did he not just find a way to let me know and save myself all the time. energy and the pain.oh well.....that's for him to answer.

so ladies and gentlemen...the truth hurts..oh yea a heck lot...but it does set you free afterwards.right now i feel like i can fly!!!! so Brandon...thanks for letting me learn that the hard way.

ciao amigos!!!

dori!